The Long Way Home

A year of detours, discipline, and believing in small wins

Dec 31, 2025

Feels like old times. It’s currently 4:54 a.m. here in Charlotte, North Carolina and I can’t sleep. I grab my laptop and it’s off to the races, venting to you all about the shortcomings of urbanism here stateside. Somewhere in it all, I always find a way to be hopeful. Maybe that’s because I’m a father of two toddlers who love public transit and walkability, and a husband to a wife discovering those benefits firsthand for the first time.

Sometimes, I even strike a chord. Posts get reshared. Occasionally by publications I admire. This is Density Dad. Or at least it was — because it’s been far too long since you’ve seen word candy from me in your inbox.

So let’s catch up.

Where things left off

In my last post, I mentioned being laid off from what felt like a natural fit: a driver and ad sales rep role at a homegrown microtransit company.

The in-between

I spent two months looking for work, coming painfully close to landing a position with the local public transit agency.

The hope

With that behind me, I set my sights on moving full-time into my role as Executive Director of Transit First CLT, the nonprofit I founded to prioritize active and rapid transit over private vehicles in the Queen City.

The catch

We have very little funding.

The stakes

At the same time, Charlotte was facing a transit tax referendum,the first of its kind in North Carolina, giving voters a chance to say “yes” to dedicated funding via a 1% sales tax increase for rapid transit, bike infrastructure, and other road improvements.

What I could do

I wrote. I published a piece laying out the facts and the real implications of a win, helping move the conversation beyond fear and into reality. It worked.

Now that we’re caught up

I landed a job as a tobacconist, curating cigars for people.

I wasn’t quite the cigar aficionado then. I was pretty casual, one cigar a week to unwind and reflect on wins and losses. These days, I’m pulling roughly 60 hours between two places, both of which allow me to hone such a craft. My palate has grown and I can practically blind taste a cigar and break down it’s make up from wrapper, filler and binder.

It’s the most scenic route of any career detour I’ve taken. And somehow, it feels right at home for someone who loves old traditions, slow rituals, and good conversation.

I also continue to serve on the city’s Public Transit Advisory Committee.

And then something small, actually it was pretty major.

Our backup stationwagon went into the shop. Which meant I was taken the famiy vehicle to work 40 minutes north of Charlotte each day.

One week in, my wife shocked me with her first-ever solo bike commute home, hopping on an undocked e-bike after I dropped her off at a meeting.

I couldn’t believe it! The next day, she did it again except this time riding to work roughly about two miles away.

I could have cried but my excitement and adrenaline wouldn’t allow it.

Why that matters

This isn’t theory anymore
It’s lived experience
It’s alternatives for families when life happens, why density matters for families

Small wins, counted

An op-ed that landed with people
The transit tax referendum passed
Kids who think buses are normal
A household that chose bikes when cars weren’t an option

Looking ahead

I’ve set firmer boundaries at my part-time work to make room to write again. More Density Dad. More clarity. More showing up, even when progress feels incremental or overshadowed by what pays the bills.

I close this post dedicating it to Bill Martin, a Richmond, Virginia icon and storyteller who unfortunately fell victim to traffic violence as he was hit and killed within a crosswalk 200 yards from his job.

Valentine director Bill Martin dies after being hit by a car

I was fortunate enough to attend a bus tour with Bill in the I Am Tourism ambassador program. It grounded me in a better understanding of the good, the bad and the darkness of my hometown. I went on to cover stories at VPM News and Next City that I heard for the first time on that bus. Whenever I saw Bill, I honored that space by thanking him for his transparency, his scrappiness. Asked questions, marveled and listened.

This feels like the right way to close out the year, honoring those who told stories before us, and recognizing that small wins still count. I can’t believe over 1,000 of you spend 5 minutes of your day reading this. I can’t thank you enough.

Here’s to hope.
Here’s to remembering.
And here’s to 2026.

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